Tag: women

Gendered Violence Towards Women

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There is a deep issue within society that transcends geographical boundaries. I am talking about gendered violence against women and girls. This problem should be as alarming as any global pandemic, but it isn’t being addressed nor treated with the intensity and importance as it should be despite cases and reported cases worryingly increasing over the past few years.

TL;DR:

Gendered violence against women and girls is a growing global crisis that transcends borders, with recent statistics showing disturbing increases in violence on public transport and in domestic settings. High-profile cases, including Sarah Everard’s murder and the horrific crimes committed by Dominique Pelicot, have sparked widespread outrage and calls for reform. In India, incidents like the public rape in Ujjain and the murder of a doctor trainee in Kolkata have fueled nationwide protests. Despite these alarming trends, there is a significant gap in reporting, with many cases going unreported due to societal stigma and fear of retaliation. The path forward requires cultural change, legal reforms, and stronger community involvement to create safer environments and support for survivors. However, these changes are only possible through collective action and sustained commitment to ending gendered violence.

A Disturbing Trend

Recent statistics have shown a significant increase in cases of violence against women on UK trains. In August 2024, I came across an article by The Guardian which claimed that violence against women on UK trains has risen by 50% in two years. According to data from The British Transport Police (BTP), the number of crimes against women and girls rose from 7,561 in 2021 to 11,357 in 2023, and the number of sexual offences rose 10% from 2,235 to 2,475. The figures for sexual harassment are even more alarming, with reports doubling to 1,908 over the two-year period.

On the 29th of May 2024, the BTP released these statistics:
• In 2022, 663 teenage girls reported sexual offences or harassment to British Transport Police.
• In 2023, this rose to 886 reports, a 25% increase.

Despite this and unsurprisingly, the police suspect many incidents remain unreported, highlighting a significant gap in data and response.

Underreporting and Misogyny

Sarika Seshadri, Head of Research and Evaluation at Women’s Aid, said ‘At Women’s Aid, we know that many women and girls choose not to report their experiences of abuse to the police, which means that scale of the issue is likely to be much larger still than these shocking figures themselves’. Societal attitudes perpetuating sexism and misogyny, undermine efforts to address and prevent violence against women.

The tragic case of Sarah Everard, whose rape and murder in March 2021 by police officer Wayne Couzens, ignited widespread outrage and calls for change. Everard’s case highlighted the urgent need for systemic reforms and heightened awareness of women’s safety in all public spaces. And now, over three years on, it’s clear that it doesn’t matter how persistent we are in our efforts, gendered violence is not treated nor addressed in the severity that is required to alleviate society from this disease. Will it ever be?

Recent Legal Outcomes

In December 2023, Ryan Johnston was sentenced to nine years in prison for the rape of a 20-year-old woman on the Piccadilly Line in February 2020, who was returning home from a night out with her friends.
On Tuesday the 17th of September 2024, Kyle Clifford, 26, appeared in court , charged with the murders of Carol Hunt, 61, and her daughters Hannah, 28, and Louise Hunt, 25, the family of BBC horseracing commentator, John Hunt. Clifford has been charged with murder, false imprisonment, and the possession of offensive weapons, including a crossbow and a butcher’s knife.
Both of these cases are a grim reminder of the violent atrocities faced by women and the urgent need for continued vigilance and reform.

The Labelling of a ‘Nice Guy’

This is further aggravated by how the media covers stories surrounding gendered violence. Mass media outlets, including Sky News, The Daily Mail and The Mirror to name a few, referred to Clifford as a ‘nice guy’ who ‘never seemed odd or aggressive’.

This labelling of painting Clifford as a ‘nice guy’ is both reductive and damaging. It gives the impression that his behaviour was out of character and completely out of the blue. It undermines the victims and the victim’s families who have just lost three women in such a horrific and violent manner. This idealisation reduces the issue of gendered violence to nothing more than just abnormal behaviour and far and few cases when in fact, on average, one woman is killed every five days by a partner or former partner in England and Wales.

Gendered violence towards women is more common than we like to admit in the UK. I mean how many ads and campaigns did we see about domestic violence around the time of the Euros this year? While football does not cause domestic abuse, existing abuse can intensify around tournaments like the Euros. A 2014 study from Lancaster University found there was a 38% increase in domestic violence incidents when England lost a game between 2002 and 2010, and a 26% rise when they won.

This year, the National Police Chief’s Council reported “During the Euros, police forces reported 351 domestic abuse incidents as being football related. This is compared to 193 domestic abuse incidents related to football during the Euros tournament in 2021. Police in the UK have also warned that excessive drinking during the tournament may contribute to a potential rise in domestic abuse.

The Dominique Pélicot Case

On the 17th of September 2024, Dominique Pelicot, a 71 year old French man admitted that for nearly a decade, he repeatedly drugged his unwitting wife and invited dozens of men to rape her while she lay unconscious in their bed. His wife Gisèle Pelicot of whom he has been married to for 50 years divorced him after his recent arrest.

Earlier today, Dominique was found guilty of all charges and sentenced to 20 years in prison whilst the 50 men standing trial alongside of him were also found guilty, though receiving significantly shorter sentences. Many of the 50 men claimed they thought they were taking part in a consensual sex game.

Police claim the men were given strict instructions such as having to park some distance from the house to not attract attention and to wait for up to an hour so that the sleeping drugs which Dominique had given Gisèle could take effect. According to the investigation, Dominique watched and filmed the proceedings, eventually creating a hard-drive file with some 4,000 photos and videos on it. Police say they have evidence of around 200 rapes carried out between 2011 and 2020, initially at their home outside Paris, but mainly in Mazan, where they moved in 2013. Investigators allege that just over half the rapes were carried out by her husband. Most of the other men lived only a few kilometres away.

Gisèle Pelicot waived her right to anonymity in hopes to raise awareness about sexual violence and encourage other victims to come forward and seek justice openly, so that ‘society could see what was happening’. She exemplifies strength and resilience.

The Rebecca Cheptegei Case

On the 5th of September 2024, Ugandan Olympic athlete Rebecca Cheptegei tragically died at a Kenyan hospital where she was being treated after 80% of her body was burned in an attack by her partner. Dickson Ndiema ambushed the marathon runner as she returned home from church two days prior, dousing her with petrol and setting her ablaze.

According to a report filed by the local chief, Cheptegei and Ndiema quarrelled over a piece of land the athlete bought in Kenya where Cheptegei lived and trained. Attacks on women have become a major concern in Kenya. In 2022 at least 34% of women said they had experienced physical violence, according to a national survey.

Outcry in India Over Public Rape and Murder Cases

A disturbing incident on September 4th, 2024, in Ujjain, India, sparked widespread outcry earlier this year. A woman, a ragpicker, was raped on a busy street by a man named Lokesh, while another individual, Mohammad Salim, filmed and shared the attack. This incident has added to the growing concern about the safety of women in public spaces.
Earlier, on August 9th, 2024, the body of a 31-year-old female doctor trainee was found raped and murdered in a seminar hall at R.G. Kar Medical College and Hospital in Kolkata. After working an exhausting 20-hour shift, the doctor trainee had settled down for a nap in a lecture hall after working nearly 20 hours of a 36-hour shift when she was assaulted, her colleagues said.
These cases led to hundreds of thousands of mass protests by doctor’s and various women groups across several cities in India. The nationwide demonstrations were fuelled by anger at the failure to impose tough laws to deter the rising tide of violence against women.

The Path Forward – Is There a Path Forward?

To address the alarming rise in gendered violence, it is crucial to recognize that meaningful change goes beyond legal reforms. The fight against violence requires a cultural transformation, where respect for women and girls becomes a fundamental value across all sectors of society. Education, awareness campaigns, and community involvement play an essential role in challenging ingrained sexist attitudes and reducing stigma around reporting violence. Furthermore, creating safer environments in public and private spaces, enhancing support for survivors, and ensuring accountability for perpetrators are key steps towards ending this epidemic. With collective action and sustained effort, we can build a society where women and girls are empowered, protected, and treated with the dignity they deserve. Of course, this is a lot easier said than done.

Blank space

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I come from a background of women whom have seen their people burned alive right in front of them, whom have had their innocence taken away from them within the matter of minutes at the hands of men whom felt entitled to their bodies.

I come from a background of women whom have suffered from severe trauma from a young age, at the hands of the British empire and Pakistani military. I come from a background of women whom were told to ‘just deal with it’: deal with the continuous monstrosities of colonialism and imperialism, and ‘carry on’.

I come from a background of women whom were expected to ‘stay silent!’ about all that had happened to them, because if a man outside of the family had found out that ‘your body was no longer innocent and clean, no man would want you.’

I come from a background of women whom migrated, and when migrating, carried their trauma. I come from a background of women whom didn’t know how to deal with their trauma because their community back home didn’t let them, because they themselves didn’t know how.

I come from a background of women whom never ever knew or know the phrases ‘I am depressed, I am anxious, I feel suffocated’.  I come from a background of women whom are severely depressed, anxious and suffocated but they get on with it because that is what they know and all that they know.

I come from a background of women whom are courageous and strong beyond your eyes could ever imagine but because these women are elderly, and their tongues do not speak English the way a native would, you wouldn’t see them as strong and courageous. You would see their small petite frames, hijabs and wrinkled faces and think of words such as frail, passive, submissive and obedient to describe them as.

I come from a background of women whom projected their issues on to me, and yet, I don’t blame them. They weren’t made aware of mental health issues, but they slowly are now. It’s difficult for some to listen and understand. And those who do listen and try to understand, struggle nonetheless.

I am a woman who will teach my children the history of their women, and teach them what it means to be strong women through my words and my actions. I will teach them that when everything isn’t okay, that, that’s okay, and that they can speak about how they are feeling.

22 years of living, and yet, I do not know my mother’s story fully. At times, randomly, she opens up to me and reveals snippets and I’m able to form jigsaw pieces. I have some pieces that show the overall narrative very briefly, but the precise details, the centre and the edges are very much a blank space.

“Muslamic ray guns”

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PART 1 

Defining Islamophobia

Islamophobia is so much more than just a simple ‘dislike of or prejudice against Islam or Muslims, especially as a political force’ (Oxford English Dictionary Online). It is an intense hatred for what encompasses the unknown. Islam is foreign. It is violent and it is threatening. Look at the rise of terrorist attacks in the contemporary. Muslim bearded men are radical and fanatical. Veiled Muslim women are medieval. We are submissive and passive. We are the epitome of oppression itself. We have yet to embrace our liberated white feminist sisters who have freed themselves of their patriarchal shackles.

The media

Gathering from the above statements, it is no wonder why Islamophobia is on the rise. Newspaper report after report after report of terrorist attacks, the rise of terrorism, the war on terror, Asian grooming gangs, ISIS, radicalised British teenagers, Hamas, the Syrian conflict, Muslim women’s illiteracy rate, Muslim women’s unemployment rate. Quite frankly, the media has a fetish for Muslims. They have an obsession with focusing on Muslims, and a compulsion with the ‘demonic rise of Islam’. It is manic. And this mania shapes and has shaped the way in which Muslims and Islam are perceived within the present.

Xenophobia unwrapped

Islamophobia however, is not merely just a hatred towards Muslims and Islam. No. It is xenophobia. It is racism wrapped around the fabric of religion. Simple as. Anyone who ‘looks’ Muslim, who ‘sounds’ Muslim, who has a ‘Muslim sounding name’ are the victims of islamophobic attacks: non-Muslim and Muslim blacks, Sikh’s, Hindu’s, Muslim, Christian and Jewish Arabs. Numerous physical attacks carried in the name of harming a Muslim, harming a terrorist have been perpetrated based on physical appearances and characteristics. The fact that individuals try to perpetrate who is Muslim and who isn’t based on physical appearance shows the profound level of ignorance prevalent in society towards minorities. Ultimately, these islamophobic attacks reveal society’s constructed ongoing racism and cyclical obliviousness to those who form the underclass. If people well and truly hated Muslims, and wanted to attack Muslims in the name of ‘protecting society from Islam’, then only Muslims would be the victims of these attacks. But they are not. Islamophobia is so much more than just people having negative stereotypes about Islam which are then manifested into attacks on Muslims. Islam is no longer just synonymous with the Middle East, Muslim men with violence and Muslim women with oppression. Islam has become synonymous with race and ethnicity and physical appearance.

 

We are all privileged in our own right

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As a visible Bengali Muslim woman who chooses to wear the hijab, yes, I have been discriminated against verbally and physically, based on my physical appearance. Growing up, as a young child, prior to me wearing the hijab, I was told by adults in my area that my brown skin was ‘dirty’, my South Asian hair was ‘greasy and oily’ and that I need to take a bath to clean the dirt off my skin. The list goes on. Now as a young adult who wears the hijab, yes, I do feel a slight sense of unease every time I go through airport security because of the way I am always patted down excessively, my hijab ruffled up and the way my passport is thoroughly checked at the boarding gate and placed through different scanning systems. My best friends who are predominantly Caucasian, East Asian and black, and not Muslim, just stand there not knowing what to do, because well, it is a ‘routine check’. That’s what I have been told. Yes, I am worried about how I am going to be perceived based on my skin colour, my hijab, everything that constitutes my physical appearance, because people have made derogatory comments to me before in the past, since I was 4 years old. And in the last five years, I’ve been spat on whilst walking home, I’ve been slapped across the face at a tube station, I’ve been called a ‘paki’ and told to go back to my country, a woman screamed at me whilst calling me an ‘Indian terrorist’ and told me that I am directly responsible for 9/11. And in the first few months of sixth form, a boy thought it was funny to throw bacon at me continuously during lunch whilst I was eating. The list goes on. I am not going to bore you. There is a blurred line between race and religion whereby Islam and Muslims have become racialised in the recent contemporary i.e. physical attacks carried out on Muslims have been done so based on ‘how Muslim a person looks’. Look at the prominent case of Balbir Singh Sodhi, just one of many since 2001. Nonetheless, even if I was to remove my hijab supposedly, I can’t remove my skin colour physically, nor do I want to. I am visibly brown, and I am visibly Muslim. And the fine line between race and religion has become significantly blurred in the 21st century. Inevitably, society has, does and is going to treat me a certain way due to these intersections that
constitute my identity.

Though I’ve had and will have my experiences of being discriminated against based on my physical appearance, nonetheless there is no denying that I am privileged in other ways. I feel that sometimes, people can see privilege in a very black and white way, literally. In fact, people forget how privileged they are, and that privilege itself does lie on a spectrum.
I’m privileged. I live in inner West London. I went to school. I went to a good sixth form. I went to a Russell group university. Every single day my dad would pick me up from school. When I used to come home, which was a 3-minute walk from my primary school, I would have a shower, I would then have my dinner which was waiting for me at the table. When I wasn’t doing my homework or extracurricular activities, I was at the library or I was playing out with my friends who lived in my area. I went to school. I was in full time education for 18 years. As a young primary school student, I had parents picking me up from school, holding my hand up until we reached our home. School was a 3-minute walk. One time my friend and I ran from school to home, it took us 1 minute. Not every child in this world has the privilege of going to school, let alone a school that is so nearby. One of my great Aunts would always tell me that she had to climb mountains and swim through lakes and rivers to go to school. I’m pretty sure she was exaggerating slightly, but she would always tell me that she used to go to school every single day, and as she set off, the poorer children her age in the village would set out to do their domestic and agricultural duties. On top of having a good education, not every child is privileged to have a parent or parents, let alone parents picking them up from school. My father passed away when I was 15 years old, at a young, crucial and pivotal moment of my life, but nonetheless, I had a strong father figure growing up who was there for me. On top of that, I had, and I do have access to clean water every single day. I never have to worry about trekking for miles looking for water, let alone water that is sanitised. I never have to trek anywhere. As a child, I was able to play out with the other children in my area without my parents having to worry extensively about my health and safety. The area in which I grew up in was a relatively safe area with a decent neighbourhood, well during daylight hours anyways. And though there were gangs in my area, incidents of knife crime, people being shot, drug dealings, arson attacks, like a lot of London in fact, which goes unheard of in the great British media, even the affluent boroughs, nonetheless it was London, West London, a city of opportunities within an economically developed country.

My mum was born in 1958 in Bangladesh, a decade after the Indian partition. Prior to 1947, Bangladesh was controlled by the British Raj. From 1947 to 1971, Pakistan intervened socially and politically in Bangladesh, trying to gain control over this small territory. After many years of conflict and turmoil Bangladesh finally gained independence and formally became a country in 1971. My mum is literate. She knows how to read and write in both Bengali and English. Growing up, she had the privilege of going to school despite her school being bombed and closed for a couple of years due to the war. My grandfather who went to Pakistan to study at university ensured that his daughters were educated and aware, so frequently he would sit with my mum and listen to her read, the same way my dad would sit with me and listen to me read my library books to him. As a child, I was never surprised that my mum knew how to read and write in Bengali, it was her mother tongue after all. And I was never surprised that she knew the history of her country so well, all the way from the British empire to the Portuguese settlers, to the Moghul, Turk and Afghan rulers, and the first Arab Muslim to set foot in her village. But, my mum would frequently tell me that she was privileged to come from an industrialised area in Bangladesh, and privileged to have a father who stressed the importance of his daughters to be educated. I never knew up until recently in fact that the adult literacy rate of Bangladesh was 29.2 % in 1981 and in 2015, 61.5 %. According to UNESCO, the average adult literacy rate in 2018 is 72.76%. I was so surprised to see these figures because 1. My mum was born in the late 1950’s, when the literacy rate was probably lower than 29.2%, and 2. It really made me put things into perspective. Unlike my mum who lived through the Bangladeshi liberation war, who saw her father, friends and other family members kidnapped, harmed and tortured right before her very eyes, who did have her house raided by the Pakistani military frequently and all their belongings stolen, and livestock burnt up, I have it good. But I realised that although my mum went through a lot growing up: being born after the Indian Partition, the dismantling of the British Empire and living through the Bangladeshi liberation war etc, she like me, saw herself as privileged primarily because she was literate and educated in comparison to other girls her age growing up who weren’t.
We are all privileged in our own right.

How to make an extra hot cup of tea the way my mum likes it

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Ingredients:
-200 ml of freshly boiled water from the kettle
-Milk
-1 teaspoon of sugar
-1 PG tips tea bag

Utensils:
-250 ml mug
-1 small saucepan
-1 tea strainer to pour out tea

Method:
1) Place the freshly boiled water from the kettle into the small saucepan. Place the saucepan on the cooker.
2) Put the tea bag in. Let the tea steep for 2 minutes. The water will turn dark red/brown and become frothy. If you like your tea strong, steep it for longer on a low heat.
3) Add however much milk you like to the saucepan for your required amount of milkiness regarding your tea.
4) Allow the tea to brew for an extra 2 minutes or until there is froth building up at the edges of the saucepan. If you like your tea strong, steep it for longer on a low heat.
5) Remove the tea bag using the teaspoon.
6) Using the tea strainer, pour out the tea from the saucepan into your mug. You want to use the tea strainer to get rid of the milk skin.
7) Add sugar to taste.

How to make an extra hot cup of tea the way my mum likes it

Ingredients:
-200 ml of negative internalised feelings
-Strength
-Transformative thoughts and thinking
-Your reaction

Utensils:
-Your mind
-Your mental filter
-Self-love and self-care

Method:
1) Place 200 ml of feelings of doubt, lack of self-worth and any other negative feelings you may have towards yourself into the saucepan.
2) Realise that you are stronger than you think you are. Allow your internal scars to speak for themselves. You are a warrior. Please realise that.
3) To counteract these negative feelings, add transformative thoughts to the saucepan. It may be hard at times but look at how far you have come in life despite the odds and look ahead. You will go even further.
4) My mum’s tea needs milk to get it out of the darkness that has engulfed it completely when in the saucepan. She cannot control the amount of liquor extracted from the tea bag, but she can control how much milk she puts in. You cannot control what comes your way in life, but you can choose how to react to each individual situation.
6) My mother uses a tea strainer to get rid of the excess milk skin that has formed at the top of the tea and hardened. Clean your mind. Filter out the negative thoughts that you may have regarding yourself and more specifically, your self-worth. Realise that you have the power to change the way you see yourself, the way you see your world and everything and everyone within it.
7) My mother loves her tea sweet. Remember to love yourself first and foremost. Take care of your mind and your body mentally, emotionally and spiritually. You matter. Put yourself first, and realise your worth.